Life goes on

When you wear your heart on your sleeve, it runs the risk of falling off and being run over. You should hide it, keep it under wraps and not let anyone peek through the facade.

I do not make friends very often or open myself up to someone easily. But when I do, there is no holding back. I love, respect and cherish my friendships. But when the spider called time spins layers and layers of webs over our day to day lives, we often lose sight of people who stand by us.

Life is a choice. Every decision we make is a conscious choice of what we choose and at the cost of what. There are people who have over time retained my place in their heart and to them I am grateful and I try my best to hold dear. And there are people who became so wrapped up in their lives that they did not notice when the door to our friendship quietly shut. I don’t hold anything against them either. It is a choice they are entitled to, and made. It may seem to me at this point of time that I have wasted my love for them over a decade of my life, but that was a choice I made too.

And now I choose to forget. To shut doors and turn towards the open ones. To open new doors and cherish those to whom I mean something. Whose lives would be incomplete without me, like mine would be without them!  

Travelogue - Roadtrip through Spain & Portugal

Roadtrip through Spain and Portugal with a 5 month old infant! It takes 7 pieces of luggage and a huge leap of faith. We figured early on in our parenthood that a baby adjusts to the kind of lifestyle you expose her to. Thus, my lil Sonu came with me on shopping trips to the mall when she was merely 6 weeks old and loved accompanying us to restaurants since she was just a month!

Rediff consolidated 2 articles of mine, the first a travelogue on Spain and Portugal and the second Handy tips on how to travel with infants. The second, I believe is very useful for new parents. It is now the last 2 slides of this article.

Please read the article here.

Tanha

Javed Akhtar touches the soul....the title track of a Pakistani show I used to watch when I was a kid - "Tanha". Lyrics below.

dekhiye to lagta hai,
zindagi ki raahon mein,
ek bheed chalti hai.
sochiye to lagta hai,
bheed mein hain sab tanha.

jitne bhi yeh rishte hain,
kaanch ke khilone hain,
pal mein toot sakte hain..
ek pal mein ho jaaye,
koi jaane kab tanha.

dekhiye to lagta hai,
jaise yeh jo duniya hai,
kitni rangeen mehfil hai,
sochiye to lagta hai,
kitna gam hai duniya mein,
kitna zakhmi har dil hai..

woh jo muskuraate the,
jo kisi ko khwaabon mein,
apne pass paate the..
unki neend tooti hai..
aur hain woh ab tanha.

dekhiye toh lagta hai
zindagi ki raahon mein
ek bheed chalti hai
sochiye toh lagta hai
bheed mein hain sab tanha

Mamma

 

Mummaaa….two lil syllables. But when they left your little lips, they could have been a song straight from heaven. When you looked at me and babbled mumma…you tore my heart up! It gave reason to the endless struggle, served as a memory modification charm as I forget the long days and endless nights I work so hard to keep you safe, happy and content.

When you rub your upturned nose on mine and smile like I am the most precious thing on earth, you give me purpose. When I feel down and out, all I need to do is look at you and know that to you, I am the world! I will spend my entire life making sure that your eyes always twinkle with mischief…and that I am always there when you stumble.

When I was working and I was asked the famous question – what is your goal in life or where do you see yourself 10 years from now, I often disappointed them with non-corporate answers about how I would be living in the hills, writing for a living and loving my children to death! The truth is that if someone asked me that now, my answer would probably be the same minus the hills (though I wish that part were true too)! I love the fact that I write professionally now…and my appraisals are not annual but daily when you wake up in the morning and smile at me telling me that you still love me! I pass with flying colours! My annual bonus may not hit the bank but the first time you crawled, when you ate your first food, your first smile and your the first time you called me mumma 2 days back….make me feel that I am the luckiest person in the whole world!

I love you. Thank you for bringing technocolour into my life! 

A Tribute to Jagjit Singh

A very sad day. The man who's ghazals would personify one's tears or smiles...himself passes away today. My all time favourite ghazal, sung by Jagjit and Chitra...

"Jab aankh se hi na tapka to phir lahoo kya hai....."

An obituary for a great man–Steve Jobs. Live Before You Die.

The world has lost a genius this week. A couple of years back, I wrote an obituary for another genius, Michael Jackson. As shocking his demise was, the sudden passing away of Steve Jobs has affected the world in a similar manner.

The man was known to be a design genius and responsible for bringing to the world (ok, elite world) beauty and humour in technology. The iMac is truly a gorgeous piece of art, the iPod revolutionized how one listens to music and the iPhone brought beauty to phones in a world where ugly Nokias were winning(before everyone started making gorgeous touch screens)! Pixar studios made kids out of adults by giving us some of the most vivid animated films we have ever seen!

The contrarian view in my life suggests that the man could perhaps be overrated and a case of fabulous branding. The technological leaps he introduced were obviously the product of toil of very able teams who never came into the limelight. Thus, would it be fair to put him in the same league as  Einstein?

As a great (and very hot) man once said “Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn”. I am not an apple fan and though I respect the phenomenal brand positioning of its products, I prefer my android phone, windows 8 and fail to see the purpose of owning an iPad as it can’t replace my phone or my laptop! Having said that, I hold the man in very very high regard. For his philosophy in life and his thought processes…and the clarity in them. Only a person who has passed through great times of adversity reaches such clarity (unless ofcourse you’re born with it like me)!!

I made my career choices to make sense of my education for 5 years. I was trying to connect the dots going forward. If only I had gathered my courage earlier and been inspired sooner, my decisions may have been made earlier than they were. Having left my rewarding marketing career 1.5 years back, I have no regrets. Because I now see everything in retrospect. My writing this blog since 5 years, my writing for Rediff on Food and Travel, the draft of my book…it all fits in now. I can see the dots connecting as I look back. Steve in his ever popular speech suggested…do what you love to do, if you haven’t found it yet, keep looking…don’t settle. And find a way of making money off it. The money I earn now may be peanuts in comparison to before, but it gives me far more satisfaction than the extra 0 in my monthly bank statement did!

And thus, a month after I read this, I quit my job to focus my energies on what I truly wanted to do. Write. My fav part of his speech – “Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”

R.I.P. Steve. You inspired millions and you helped me find the courage to follow my heart. My thoughts are with your family who shall miss you the most.

 

If you haven’t read the gazillion forwards with his speech, you can read it here.

In retrospect!

I wish I were a baby. I could sleep when I wanted and play when I rather be awake. If I were hungry, all I had to do was let out a wail and food would be presented to me. Dont like the taste, no worries, let me refuse this and wait for something new to be prepared! Everyone would look at me as if I were the most beautiful thing on earth and clap their hands in delight if I did as much as bother to look them in the eye and smile!

Before a tear would drop from my eyes, there would be hands to brush it away and hold me close. If I felt lonely even in the middle of the night, someone would wake from the deepest slumber and cuddle me till I was alright. I could hit out at with my tiny fists  towards whomever I wanted, look away when spoken to and not be reprimanded.

When someone would come after a long day, all I had to do was look at the person and they would indulge me for hours, cooing their stresses away. Every taste I tried would be new, every experience fresh! I could sit on my seat and I would be wheeled around happily by everyone for hours.

I would be protected from the evils of the world. Even before I fell, hands would reach out to cushion me. I wouldn't have to try to please people, somehow my presence would be enough to do that! I would not be alone or lonely even for a moment!

I wish I were a baby.